Image source princessdemioke.me
WRITTEN BY OZOVEHE EMMANUEL
Okon a graduate and a soccer fanatic hastened to the car park to join a night bus. He arrived at the park at the time he had planned, which meant a (1-0) score to his advantage.
It was just 6:30am when Okon saw the “This is Lagos” signpost. It was his first time in the glamorous and well talked about state. In no time he sensed from the atmosphere that he was amidst impatient citizens as his eyes glued on the window; watched drivers claim rights to lanes in the Lagos traffic.
The bus moved like a giant tortoise along the road allowing Okon more actions of the Lagos local transport handlers: Curses and counter curses flew out of the mouths of a conductor (money-collector) and a commuter ̶ in disagreement of the already agreed fair for his journey.
The bus Okon boarded from Akwa ibom state came to a halt at Berger junction at 6:53am and all passengers alighted. He inquired from a fellow passenger where he could get a bus to Ikeja ̶ where he had a job interview.
She welcomed the question with a smile and responded:
“I am heading towards ikeja, i would direct you as we go.”
Hearing this made Okon glad because he had been meaning to talk to her since the journey started in Akwa Ibom but could not; some other dude had engaged her in a dialogue.
“She’s very beautiful,” he always thought, as he peeking at her throughout the journey to Lagos.
She was the perfect example to how his friends always classified the beauty a Lagos girl possessed.
Okon, a local Casanova in Akwa Ibom saw the need to kill two bears with a single blow; (2-0), helped her with one of her luggage as they walked. His head opened to his wooing lines as he drew them out like swords to pierce her with his presumed sugar-coated tongue.
At the bus stop where they were to board the ikeja bus, she told Okon that her stomach worms were seriously feeding on its walls and instant food was the only remedy; he concurred and they both walked up to a local food vendor by the road.
“Abeg put rice #100 with shaki and pomo,” she requested.
Okon refused eating but footed the bills for all she ordered; he always saw meals before an interview as bad omen because it made him heavy. She ate slowly owing to Okon’s funny statements; Okon believed women loved funny men. He told her about himself, she laughed, nodded and winked at him as she responded.
She was finally done with her meal at 7:30am so they walked up and boarded a bus. After every two minutes drive or so, the bus stopped to the alighting or to pick a passenger. Okon was having a nice time with this young lady that he didn’t realize how time flew. It was already 9am and they were not yet in Ikeja. The interview was schedule for 8:45am.
“With this kind of traffic, am sure the interview would be delayed,” he consoled himself.
9:45, now he was practically shaking. The situation was identical in every regard to his last three failed job interviews. Okon in no time became lost in his thoughts, but was brought back to reality at some minutes past 10am when his companion told him he has got to the location in Ikeja.
Okon quickly took his small bag and without any real goodbyes ran off to the three storey building she had pointed at. He felt something fell off him, but nothing seemed more important compared to him getting to the building.
He dashed into the building, approaching the receptionist.
“Good Morning ma,” he greeted.
“Good morning, how may I be of assistance?” Receptionist replied.
“I am here for the interview,” he said.
The lady smiled mockingly,
“Like seriously? Who comes for an interview two hours after the stipulated time? You can’t be serious,” she responded.
“I am serious ma, if i narrate you my story, you would pity me,” Okon replied.
The lady gave him her ears. Okon offered explanation that was not quite an explanation, how there was traffic, omitting the part he waited for a lady to eat at a canteen. She burst out in laughter as he concluded.
“I am so sorry my brother, Lagos traffic deserves a novel of its own,” she said, after holding back her laughter.
Okon spent another hour trying to sweet talk the receptionist for audience with the company’s management with no avail; he decided to leave.
He got outside the building and decided to have his first meal in the restaurant beside the office. Okon sat down after making his order; he checked his bag and could not find his wallet. He shouted in shock as all eyes fell on him.
“I am finished,” he screamed.
“I didn’t eat breakfast, I didn’t get to do the interview, I didn’t ask for the lady’s mobile number and now I’ve lost my wallet ,” he said aloud.
One of the guys in the restaurant laughed and said “brother, take heart, na 0-4 be dat oooooo.”